


Grey

by entanglednow



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-01
Updated: 2011-05-01
Packaged: 2017-10-20 21:24:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/217232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/entanglednow/pseuds/entanglednow





	Grey

Sam's not quite half awake when he notices that there's an Archangel cross-legged on the end of his bed. Luckily this is the one who probably doesn't want to kill him. Or at least didn't the last time they'd seen each other.

Gabriel's trailing cold air like he's just come from outside. Though he's staring like he's been waiting for Sam to wake up for hours (which isn't creepy at _all_.) He's never exactly been threatening, physically, he's short, awkward looking, easy to dismiss entirely. Sometimes Sam forgets - like he forgets with Castiel - that there's an angel folded all up inside there. Layers and layers that could expand outwards and tear everything within range apart. That's there's the force of an Archangel behind those eyes.

Sam rubs at his face until he's awake enough to deal with stalker Archangels in the middle of the night."

"Is there are reason you're lurking in the dark? Aren't you supposed to be upstairs, bossing angels around?"

"I'm still on probation," Gabriel drawls out the word like it's something ludicrous.

He stays quiet on the end of the bed, fingers picking imaginary fluff off of the sheets.

Sam waits. Because there's clearly _something_.

"I'm finding it...difficult to submit," Gabriel says eventually, quietly, mouth twisted up at the edge like he's amused about so many things in the sentence. "Maybe I've forgotten how."

Before Sam can think of anything to say to that Gabriel's talking again.

"I did it for millions of years and now suddenly it's all wrong. I was out there on my own for centuries, for thousands of years. I was worshipped - and you have no idea what that's like. When people give you anything, _everything_ you ask for." Gabriel shifts and slithers forward on his knees, shoving Sam's foot aside so he can get closer. "There's nothing too wrong, or obscene when you're a god. It was wild and furious. I had the whole shebang. I was king of my own castle. I was angry and I covered the taste of angel in blood, so thick that no one would ever find me."

Gabriel laughs, short and hard.

"It's proving harder than I expected to wash off." He stretches out a hand, stares at it like it's part of the problem, then drops in into his lap.

"But he wanted you to come home," Sam reminds him. "He forgave you, and he wanted you back."

Gabriel shakes his head, once, viciously.

"He wanted Gabriel back," he says stiffly. "I didn't even notice when I stopped being who I was. But we're not supposed to change. We're not supposed to be able to."

Sam moves his foot before Gabriel kneels on it. "You're still Gabriel."

"I'm not -" Gabriel stops, laughs again and this time it sounds horrible. "I'm really not. But if I'm not that...what am I, exactly?"

It's not mockery but a quiet sort of desperation in Gabriel's expression.

"If this is a test, then I'm not going to pass."

Sam doesn't know what to say.


End file.
